DRESS CODE / WHO SEZ SEW?
I took my daughter clothes shopping for school this year and we both were freaked with frustration by the time we got home. Her school has a DRESS CODE that must be followed or you get sent to the office to get a change of clothes or win a trip home. Apparently, the schools and the fashion industry do not talk to each other about “THE CODE" so girls have a lot of attire choices. So our mother – daughter outing turned into ugly expressions and gritted teeth as we agreed on NOTHING she could wear to school. (Sound familiar?) We did agree on one question. Who is responsible for making up the school dress code?
As a mentor /leader of a GIRLSMATTER club, I decided to ask the girls at middle school what they knew about the DRESS CODE. “All I know is that the minute I hear “DRESS" code I feel like it’s mainly pointed at girls! Why isn’t it called ATTIRE code or CLOTHES code; anything but DRESS code!" “Why is it that when a teen guy dresses like a man its okay, but when a teen girl dresses like a women people think she’s trying to be a “HOTTIE" to distract the guys in class?" “Gee, nobody ever asked me my opinion about what I want to wear on MY body….not the school or the stores!" “Yeah, well I had to quit basketball because I had a bellybutton ring and wouldn’t take it out! I’m an awesome player…my bellybutton is my business! Who makes up the stupid dress code, anyway?" “TEENS HAVE RIGHTS, TOO!"
Teens do have rights! In fact, it’s called the Bill of Rights and since you spend so much of your life in school it’s a great place to learn and try out how your government works before you start voting for the adult stuff. (That’s at 18 years old).
Teens, teachers, and parents should all have the right to be heard when dress codes are being written. The administration needs to see all points of view to make a fair decision, too. It sure would help if we took a sec to try and see where each group is coming from, and not just think our opinion is the winner. If you still disagree with the rules after you have heard all the sides, then you owe it to your school administration to tell them why you disagree!
EDUCATE YOURSELF ACTION PLAN
-
QUESTION: Check out your student handbook about DRESS CODE. Write questions about the dress code the make you crazy or confused.
-
INFORM: Learn how different sides think by clicking on FAIR COURTS: WHAT'S THE CONCERN. Then find out who makes the decisions about the DRESS CODE (Principal, teachers, parents, students etc.).
-
INTERVIEW: Ask questions of those making the decision and LISTEN to their answers. Interview your family, friends, teachers, Madonna, Justin T., whoever. Takes notes.
-
DISCUSS RESULTS: Share what you’ve learned with the girls in your club. Tell us what you found out on the DISCUSSION FORUM. Then form your own opinion based on the facts and voices that you heard.
-
TAKE ACTION: Do you have a better understanding of why the rules are made after hearing different points of view? Do you feel better or worse about the DRESS CODE? What needs to be changed? What action could you take?
BEFORE you hit the road to talk to the “OLDER ONES," try these cool things to rev up your engines (courage and voice).
- Mirror Talk: after you laugh yourself silly..ask your questions looking in a mirror to see how you will look to them.
- Dry Run: get your BF to play the “OLDER ONE" and answer your questions (seriously!).
- Buddy Booster: take along a human who believes you are smart and awesome. Of course, you may not need this if you already know this about yourself.
- HINT: You are trying to educate yourself and learn to form opinions so tell people that.
LOG on to the DISCUSSION FORUM and talk to us about what you find out about what different people think! Then let’s discuss online what actions might make a difference.
Posted on: 9/30/2003
return
to top
